Last week I faced a lot of anxiety. I feel like I haven’t been the best at keeping with “family Christmas traditions”, instead trying new things every year, which is all well and good, but does that make it less memorable? And now that Santa is behind us, will children also look forward to Christmas morning? We don’t cut down trees in the forest, we don’t go to midnight mass, I couldn’t pay my family to go caroling (sad), I don’t make pretty cookies, and I often forget to make holiday cards altogether (I have no addressing system!!). So last week I started feeling a little nervous (which is silly but very “me” and in line with my parenting anxieties). When my kids grow up, will they even remember the time of year I love so much?? Will they miss the old memories and want to come home to relive them at the age of 24 and 26?? Then I had an epiphany. The day after Thanksgiving, we always go for a walk to the same river and always eat the same Nutburger lunch (shout out to Sunflower in Fair Oaks). We always go to Brian’s cousin’s house that night, and we always have delicious lemon dips (for the adults) and a scrumptious hot chocolate bar for the kids. And then we always have a dance party (three generations shaking it up in the living room). It’s so simple but so special, and our kids talk about it all year long. Those are absolutely our traditions. I like to remind myself (and you) that it’s more important to be simple and specific than big and thrilling – as if eating or drinking the same specific thing at around the same time every year also makes it feel special. Wearing a Santa hat. Opening the poppers. So I made a list of things we do (not just one-time events) as well as things I know it’s not too late to start and I would love your help with some ideas for older kids (now that Santa is officially “dead” – which is so sad, it seems like a lot of the magic has disappeared overnight.)
family ornament party
It’s our favorite night of the year, when we hang up ornaments and remember the stories behind them. Every family trip, every first tooth lost, every major accomplishment, hell, we even have a Ruth Bader Ginsburg ornament and an ornament for our favorite cat, Bearcat, when she passed. Not to mention the annual special gifts I give the kids at Christmas, and they give us too (just make sure you sign and date them at the bottom). We always have hot apple cider (both adult and kid versions), and it’s usually saved for the Saturday after Thanksgiving (this year, we had to decorate early, so we did it the Saturday before Thanksgiving). I love this night, and it really starts the season. We usually end it with the first holiday movie, too. Even when the kids are out of the house, I’ll save the special ornament hanging in the decor for when they arrive (I really can’t imagine how big it will be by then – it’s still dripping!).
framed Santa picture display
The first few years, I just had these in a box, but once I framed them, I realized how much joy it brought to the kids and me to relive them and display them. This year, I deleted them by only one child per year (I had a bunch of repetitions – the same horizontal and vertical, with us, without us, with grandparents, without grandparents, etc.). I also framed them in finished gold frames which fit this home better than simple white frames.
Soup and Grilled Cheese on Christmas Eve
The 22nd or 23rd is usually when people are coming into town, and everyone wants home-cooked comfort food, but after the trip, in the usual way. I didn’t realize it was such a hard tradition, but I always do it, so from now on I will follow it and call it our family tradition. One year, I made grilled cheese bars (with tomatoes, bacon, basil, avocado, etc.) and homemade tomato soup, which was very tasty but a lot of fun. This year, I have this panini maker that makes amazing sandwiches.
Big Neighborhood Jewelry Exchange (and Craft Party)
We host a big party with all our school friends (and parents who are our friends), which turns out to be a total blast. Everyone dresses up in festive attire, and the children pick out names and secretly buy each other jewellery. This keeps the budget really simple and focused for everyone involved. We make it a big old thing where they open one one by one, and everyone “oohs and aahs” (they’re usually based on the kids’ interests at the time). Again, sign and date! This year, I want to add a hot chocolate bar for the kids. We usually do a big, organized photo ornament craft (but this year the sixth grade boys are protesting).
Zoo lights followed by a fun restaurant
Of course, this is more fun for kids than adults (it’s usually raining), and we’ve almost eliminated it this year, but when a cousin asked Charlie what our family traditions are, she said “zoo lights” so bright, so I realized that, of course, we’ll keep doing that. We usually do this with the same family and have a really fun dinner afterward at a kid-pleasing place (it’s even more fun on a weeknight because weekends are so packed).
decorate the family shelter
This is the third year we’ve had the chance to decorate this family haven in Portland. We let the kids invite their friends ,so they can have more fun and spread the atmosphere of service), and I have to be very organized or it’s chaotic which is not exactly appropriate for a family shelter ,families only join if they want to join, some come and help us because they get excited but most are in their rooms). It’s extremely gratifying, and I hope it leaves a mark on our kids ,and the shelter is so grateful that someone is making it possible). We go out to eat later, and I slowly try to establish his influence ,and that involves a lot of dishes). We’re always holding a family hug or pulling a gift from the tree at the mall, but this tradition feels really solid and memorable because it’s so tangible and tactile ,and fun). ,Family Promise of the Tualatin Valley Always looking for gift cards for moms so they can buy more specific toys and gift cards for their kids so they can buy whatever they want – they have a huge inventory of toys for little ones, but if you’re in Portland, feel free to drop off a Target or Fred Meyer gift card :)) Thank you so much to my parents for creating so many traditions around the service (year round). The Mormons (and many organized community religious establishments) really have it dialed down.
Play absolutely hilarious family games
I can’t take credit for this. My siblings and all the cousins (and grandparents) come over on Christmas Eve, and let me tell you, my Mormon family knows how to entertain themselves without alcohol. My little sister (who is the younger TikTok version of me) brings games, and they are absolutely ridiculous. One is where she wraps something (like layers and layers of it) in a box covered with packing tape, and then you have to go around the table and, wearing only oven mitts, try to open it (30-second time limit). The other is blindfolded and trying to get cotton balls onto a paper plate (not sure we’d win over that, but everyone looks so stupid, that’s the point).
Matching Family Christmas Pajamas
I did this for years and fell off the wagon in the last 2 years (we all wore matching “Feliz Navydog” sweatshirts with Buttercup and Oscar on them). But this year I’m bringing it back. hannah anderson FTW! It’s not something we did growing up (with six kids), but it’s a silly and weird kind of connection.
Of course, there’s all the little things – lots of family Christmas movie nights, cookies left at the neighbors’ (very easy cookies that I can actually cook), and that same breakfast casserole on Christmas morning. But I guess I just feel like now that kids don’t believe in Santa, they don’t look forward to Christmas like they used to (which is true), and I want it to feel magical despite this big shock. After looking at this list, I’m thinking we’re okay 🙂 I also fully admit that I do a lot and the kids certainly don’t lack anything, so I’m creating my own stress and I’m my own problem, but I think most moms want their kids’ holidays to be magical and full of nostalgia for more than just presents (and Santa).
I’d love to hear any favorite simple traditions you have that might be especially great for older children (all are welcome!). Or maybe it’s just a little thing you add to a common tradition to make it feel like it’s a family thing? The “Epic Hot Chocolate Bar” was the best example of this. Do you always pull any punches? Do you do any silly pranks? Any special coffee drinks you would like to try? A silly song that only your family sings?
Comment away, guys 🙂
Opening Image Credit: Photo by Keltin Green From: Christmas 2025 in our house – whimsical, colorful and non-traditional in a really cozy way
